I haven’t posted here in a long time. I needed to think about what I was saying and for a long time I had no desire to write. I felt I had nothing to say and I lost my direction.
Then at Christmas (my favourite time of year) I read The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins. Why, oh why did I choose to read it then? He confused me and put me in an awful mood with raging doubts. Dawkins does write well and a lot of his arguments have been going around in my head for a long time and he is convincing. I wish I had a faith that was a strong as some people I know. The unshakeable kind! So, I suffered my doubts and have been in a sort of wilderness. But God doesn’t seem to want to let me go.
Despite my doubts I have continued to attend church, even though sometimes it felt like going through the motions. When I did miss a week I felt there was something missing. I find it hard to describe how I feel at times and why I am so drawn to churches and spiritual matters. However much I try to ignore them they work themselves into me and to be honest I cannot imagine my life without a faith. It is too deep within me.
Easter is a time of new life, spring brings hope. Creation is wonderful isn’t it?